


We'll Be Having Some Fun

by poisonivory



Series: Defenders of the Second Grade [3]
Category: Daredevil (TV), Iron Fist (TV), Jessica Jones (TV), Luke Cage (TV), The Defenders (Marvel TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Elementary School, Gen, Kid Fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-16
Updated: 2017-08-16
Packaged: 2018-12-16 00:32:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,306
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11817471
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poisonivory/pseuds/poisonivory
Summary: Mr. Urich's class takes a trip to the beach. Things go predictably haywire.





	We'll Be Having Some Fun

**Author's Note:**

> For the "Devil and the deep blue sea" prompt on my Daredevil Bingo card! Title is from "Under the Boardwalk."

“All right, here’s the plan,” Matt said, huddled with Jessica, Luke, and Danny behind a small dune. “Jessica comes in from the left, Danny from the right. I circle around behind the Nelsons and approach from behind. And Luke goes straight down the center.”

Jessica squinted critically at the diagram Matt had drawn in the sand with his cane. “That doesn’t look like anything.”

Luke glared over the dune at Frankie, standing triumphant over his conquered ground. “Why don’t we just all punch him?”

Mr. Urich’s class trip to the beach hadn’t started out so contentiously. The bus ride to Rockaway had been uneventful except for Malcolm getting sick, which wasn’t noteworthy because it happened every time he got on a bus.

Once they’d reached the beach, most of the kids had made a beeline for the water, despite Mr. Urich’s best efforts to rein them in, along with chaperones Mr. and Mrs. Nelson, Mrs. Mahoney, and Mrs. Temple. Colleen and Misty turned clumsy cartwheels in the surf; Matt did his level best to fight the ocean. Marci tried and failed to get Brett to admire her new bathing suit.

And Foggy, Claire, Joy, and a no-longer-green Malcolm built The Greatest Sandcastle of Ever.

It was a masterpiece. Even the rarely impressed, like Davos and Jessica, had to admit that. It had ten towers, some of them stacked as high as three or four buckets’ worth of sand. There was a moat, which Joy had dug deep enough that it was self-filling, and the whole thing was decorated with a vast array of seashells Foggy and Malcolm had collected. Claire had even managed to construct a delicate sand drawbridge over the moat.

Everyone had been admiring it when Mrs. Temple called the class over for ice pops. When the castle builders returned, they discovered that Frankie had claimed their castle for himself. He was standing triumphantly in its tiny courtyard, two melting Fla-Vor-Ices holstered in the pockets of his camo trunks.

“Frankie, get out of our castle, you’re gonna crumble it,” Joy said.

Frankie popped the brim of his baseball cap (also camo). “My castle now,” he said.

Foggy and Malcolm gasped. “It is not!” Foggy said. Frankie usually intimidated him, but not when he had The Rules on his side. “We built it! That means it’s ours!”

“You left. Possession’s nine-tenths of the law.” Frankie didn’t exactly know what that meant, but he’d heard some big kids say it and he liked it.

“That is _not_ a law!” Foggy insisted.

“Well, my name’s Castle, so I get all castles,” Frankie pointed out.

“That’s dumb. I don’t own all temples,” Claire said.

“‘Cause you’re not tough enough.”

“And I don’t own all ducasses!” Malcolm added.

“What’s a ducasse?” Joy whispered.

“I don’t know, but I don’t have any.”

“Enough!” Claire said, stomping her foot. “Frankie, get out of our castle or I’ll pull you out.”

“Noooo you’ll wreck it,” Malcolm said softly.

Ignoring him, Claire marched towards Frankie. Frankie bent down and picked up a massive Super Soaker that he had somehow smuggled on the bus.

“Don’t you dare…” Claire warned.

Frankie let loose. The castle builders shrieked and ran away as Frankie shook the Super Soaker triumphantly at the sky. “Super Soakers aren’t allowed!” Foggy called over his shoulder as he ran.

And thus some of the more indignant members of the class were left to correct this gross miscarriage of justice. No one had told Mr. Urich or any of the chaperones - Foggy had cut his foot on a seashell while running away and all of the adults were busy placating him with an extra Fla-Vor-Ice and trying to keep Claire from bandaging everyone and everything in sight. It was this last injury that had kindled the light of vengeance in Matt’s eyes.

“We’re taking Frankie _down_ ,” he said now from their hiding place.

“Yeah, he’s a jerkbutt,” Jessica agreed.

“But how do we get close without him shooting us?” Danny asked.

“Uh, it is just water,” Luke pointed out.

“It’s the principle of the thing!” Matt declared.

“You could just sneak up on him,” a voice directly behind them said. All four self-proclaimed castle-defenders squawked and bolted, Luke practically carrying Danny as he went.

Ellie chuckled and calmly spread her Egyptian cotton beach towel out on the abandoned dune.

Meanwhile, Karen was scolding Frankie, hands on her hips and mouth stained blue from her ice pop.

“Frankie Castle, you stop spraying people and give them their castle back!” she said. “They built it and you stole it and that’s not right! That’s a _crime_.”

“I’m not a criminal!” Frankie retorted indignantly. “Criminals are bad guys. They walked away. That makes it fair game.”

“It does not and you know it!” she said.

Frankie sniffed and looked away. “No rules on the beach,” he said. “You can come in here too if you want. It’s a pretty big castle.”

“No. I’m mad at you,” Karen said. “And if you don’t give them their castle back and say you’re sorry, I won’t sit next to you on the bus on the way home.”

Frankie gaped at her, then glowered. “I don’t want to sit next to a _girl_ anyway.”

Karen tossed her pigtails. “Fine!” she said.

“Fine!”

“ _Fine._ ”

Karen stalked off past the castle-defenders, who had decided that a frontal assault was the way to go.

“Okay, Frankie, you have until the count of three to get out of there!” Matt said.

“Like you can count to three,” Frankie scoffed.

“I can! I can count to three _hundred_ ,” Matt said indignantly.

“Prove it.”

“One, two, three…”

Jessica elbowed him. “He’s trying to ‘stract you, stop.”

“Oh.”

“Come on, Frankie,” Luke said. “Give them their castle back.”

In answer, Frankie shot Luke in the chest with his Super Soaker. The other three defenders gasped in horror, but Luke didn’t flinch. (Of course, the Super Soaker was mostly empty by now and the water fairly warm from sitting in the sun, so it wasn’t much of a shot.)

“What else you got?” Luke asked.

For the first time, Frankie blanched. “Um...you guys are doodyheads?”

“VENGEANCE!” Danny shrieked and raced across the sand, the others hot on his heels. Frankie emptied the Super Soaker at them, then turned to flee, but Matt caught him around the ankles and tackled him onto Claire’s delicate drawbridge. Sand flew in the air.

“WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?”

All five kids froze, then slowly turned to look at Mr. Urich (well, Matt turned to listen to him).

“Um,” Jessica said. “We’re building a sand castle?”

Later, on the bus, Foggy propped his wounded foot up in Matt’s lap. It was swathed in one normal bandage, plus about twenty band-aids that Mr. Urich had finally caved and let Claire apply. “Thanks for trying to save our castle, Matty, even if it meant you squished it,” he said.

“Any time,” Matt promised loyally.

“Next time let’s just go to our daddies’ beach houses,” Joy said to Danny. Danny groaned in response. He had wiggled away from all attempts to put sunblock on him and was as red as a lobster.

“Boys stink,” Karen said from her spot next to Jessica, and Jessica nodded vehemently.

“Maybe not all of them,” Claire hedged, smiling at Luke, who coughed and turned to look out the window.

Frankie sat sulkily next to Malcolm in the front seat, where Mr. Urich could watch him. “Another fight on a field trip,” Mr. Urich said. “Do you think maybe you could have made some better choices today, Frankie?”

“No,” Frankie said, and scowled.

Malcolm swayed into him, looking green again. “Mr. Urich? I think I’m gonna…”

“Gross!” Frankie said, as Malcolm snatched at the bag Mr. Urich handed him and heaved.

Okay. Maybe at least _one_ mistake had been made.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry, Malcolm. For some reason my brain was like "MALCOLM DEFINITELY GETS CARSICK" and wouldn't let go of it.
> 
> [Come talk to me about this AU on tumblr!](http://pluckyredhead.tumblr.com/tagged/elementary+school+au)


End file.
